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Most people behave fairly predictably when tragedy strikes. For instance, we often look outside ourselves for the source of our trouble. When a divorce occurs, one spouse usually doesn't want it. He or she may place the blame on a third party, such as the person with whom the spouse seeking the divorce is having an extramarital relationship. Years ago, it was possible to sue an outsider who interfered with your marriage for what was then called "alienation of affections." A court could actually order the third person to pay money damages to an injured spouse. Although the target of these suits was usually a spouse's girlfriend or boyfriend, it could have been anyone who interfered with the married life of the couple. Sometimes, even in-laws were sued. The success rate was not high, but that did not prevent suits from being filed in this emotionally charged atmosphere. However, alienation-of-affection lawsuits are legal relics now. They were abolished in Arizona in 1977, because of changing values in our society and because they were often used to harass, embarrass and injure innocent people. Perhaps the only surprise is that it took until 1977 to abolish them. Considering the complex nature of human relationships generally and marital relationships in particular, most experts in the field of human behavior considered them relics long before 1977. So, if your marriage is breaking up and reconciliation is impossible, you can still look to the legal system for help, but only with divorce, legal separation or annulment. The days are gone when you could sue a third party for interference with your marriage. Rarely is a third party truly responsible for breaking up a marriage. Most people do not have to look that far for the cause of a failing relationship. |